deciding to leave

Wednesday, November 12, 2008 1:48:02

it is thrilling.


i feel like leaving for mexico is the best idea i have had in so many years. it is a recommitment to what i love, and it serves all sides of me. it will be challenging and poetic and important, and people who don't understand this as an artistic act will value it as an educational exploit nonetheless. and i am okay with that, because it will help me to move creatively in disguise, while hiding nothing, along the lines of power that are already defined. it is my metamorphosis and my manipulation.

and in another way, how could i be a scholarly contributor to the field of literacy reform as a monolingual person? and more importantly, why would i want to be? it doesn’t have to be about pedagogy; this will just happen. it will spill over, an organically integrated form of my heart and mind, at last. i already think bilingually, you see, but i have only one language to speak it. this has been a problem, a way of feeling trapped. perhaps i should speak a hundred languages for the way that i imagine the world.

this is it.